declined by the fake idea of the apophasis which generally discludes my rendition on life.
in simpler words.
my life sucks.
I feel divided by this ever-tugging battle that is growing to become a war against my relationships with people. I have always been so experienced at hiding away the battle torn, withered man that constantly rages against himself. Derived from reason or rhyme I am slowly striped of dignity, respect, and most of all loyalty and trust in my efforts to understand my inner being. Is this wrong? God, in my effort to obtain you I am repeatedly beaten down by the same force that I find to be secure. I want to be that man with no blanket to hold to, no worldly security to hide under. I want my relationship with you, God, to be free from restriction. Yet here I stand unable to feel your covering, your protection, so constantly I am wrestling with everyone and and everything around me, holding on to the belief that this war, some how, some way, brings my mind into a closer connection with yours. But the emotion and discontent settling like butterflies inside, begs to differ.
What am I to do?
No comments:
Post a Comment